Ben Affleck explained why he restrained himself from speaking at length about his rekindled relationship with Jennifer Lopez before their marriage and subsequent divorce.
Describing himself as a “not perfect man,” the “Argo” director, 52, shared that he wanted to “exercise a little restraint” and avoid “going into gossipy detail” about his and Lopez’s second shot at love in an attempt to avoid the same mistakes the couple made when they first started dating.
“One of the harder lessons that I have learned is that it’s not wise to share everything with the world,” Affleck told The Wall Street Journal in December 2021.
“There are some things which are private and intimate and have meaning in terms of their intimacy by dint of the fact that they’re not shared with the rest of the world.”
He added, “I’m more comfortable just learning to find a boundary between things that I want to share and things that I don’t. I don’t know if it’s good or bad. I don’t.”
One of those boundaries was discussing his love life with the news media.
“I know that I feel more comfortable having those healthy boundaries in my life around which, in a friendly and straightforward way, I tell you, I just don’t want to be talking about my personal relationship in the newspaper.”
“I’m going to exercise a little restraint,” he said.
When pressed for how Bennifer 2.0 was born, Affleck was circumspect in his response.
“I can say that it’s definitely beautiful to me,” he allowed. “And, you know, one of the things I really value across all facets of my life now is that it was handled in a way that reflected that.”
“My life now reflects not just the person that I want to be,” he explained, “but the person that I really feel like I am—which is not perfect, but somebody who tries very hard and cares very much about being honest and authentic and accountable.”
The “Air” actor added that “it’s hard to say who benefits more” from his restraint.
“I could just say that I feel great about being very healthy. And it is a good story. It’s a great story. And, you know, maybe one day I’ll tell it. I’ll write it all out.”
“And then I’ll light it on fire,” he said with a laugh.
Speaking of how he and Lopez, 55, got a second chance at love, the Oscar-winner said, “I am very lucky in my life in that I have benefited from second chances, and I am aware that other people don’t even get first chances.”
“I’ve had second chances in my career,” he went on. “I’ve had second chances as a human being. Life is difficult, and we are always failing and hopefully learning from those failures.”
“The one thing you really need to avail yourself of the opportunities provided from that growth is the second chance. I’ve definitely tried to take advantage of that.”
Affleck’s decision to be restrained make sense given what he’s previously said about the end to their previous engagement back in 2003.
“I think Jen and I made a mistake in that we fell in love, we were excited and maybe too accessible,” Affleck said on the British TV series “Live” in 2008. “I don’t think either of us anticipated the degree to which it would take on a world of its own.”
Lopez filed for divorce from Affleck on Tuesday, August 20 on the anniversary of their second wedding ceremony.
