Dear Abby: My “best friend”, as he has labeled our relationship, moved in with me eight months ago. He claims he has no romantic feelings for me. Despite this he sleeps on the bed next to me and kisses me. (He claims he was asleep when he did this and says he doesn’t remember it happening.) He encourages us to be sexually intimate and when I talk to my mother He sends me “I miss you” messages every day when I leave town to meet him.
He says he doesn’t want to be with me because “he doesn’t see me that way.” He also talks to another girl. They also claim that they are just friends and only have a platonic connection, but I have seen kissing emojis, miss you texts, and nude photos between them.
I am feeling addicted and I asked her to leave, but she refused to accept my request. When I asked him why he lives with me, he said it’s because I’m a better alternative to sleeping on the couch next to his mom’s dog. I can’t tell you how painful it was to hear this.
At this point, he owes me $1,000 in unpaid rent, and I feel like I’m in love with someone who doesn’t even have the ability to love himself. How do I get this man out of my home and out of my heart so that I don’t feel like I have a live-in maid, concubine, bank account, chef, and personal assistant in exchange for the privilege of being abused? – used in Georgia
Dear Used: How do you get this poor excuse for a man out of your heart? The tone of your letter suggests that you are already more than halfway there. Turn off the money tap, stop cooking for him and washing his clothes, and when he climbs into your bed, kick him out and tell him if he wants sex, go to your other “friend.” Take. Consulting a lawyer about your refusal to leave your home will be money well spent, as it may require a formal eviction.
Dear Abby: My sister got engaged recently. I am so happy for her. Her fiancé is amazing. We’ve always been close, and I’m going to be his maid of honor. The problem is, ever since they’ve been dating, and especially now that they’re married, I’ve started to get jealous. I feel like a little green monster when I see them together.
It’s not about her fiancé – it’s just that I can’t help but wish I had one. It feels like a punch in the stomach when they’re driving by each other and I’m driving the third car. I don’t like fighting these feelings when I’m really happy for both of them. But I feel jealous and then guilty for feeling this way and I’m fed up of it ruining my actual happiness. What should I do? , don’t like this feeling
Dear don’t: I respect your willingness to accept your feelings. None of us are proud to feel jealous, but most of us have experienced jealousy at one time or another. (That’s why it’s included in the list of the seven deadly sins.) Be happy that your sister has found her life partner, and Please Have faith that you too will meet yours. It may not happen today or tomorrow, but one day when you least expect it, you’ll turn around and he’ll be there.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jean Phillips, and founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby http://www.DearAbby.com or PO Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
