Parents with older children warned me: “Just wait – soon you will be an Uber driver for your children.”
They were right. And it’s driving me (excuse the word) crazy.
Yes, as a driver, I’m five stars, I don’t have children! They are not worried about their passenger rating.
If I were to rate them as passengers, they would be one star. And I think that’s generous because my calculations include their behavior at home as well as in the car.
My weekends are spent refereeing fights and driving
Allow me to share a glimpse of my past weekend.
My kids woke up at 6:30 a.m. Even though they had nowhere to go until 10 a.m., their demands started as soon as they slammed our bedroom door.
Parents, you can fill in the blanks, but here’s how it went from 6:30 to 6:31 a.m.:
“I want…”
“That’s just…”
“Can I…”
“Where is mine…”
I know – this is the life we chose as parents – but still. it is busy.
The list of demands was endless, while my instructions and requests went unheard.
Our weekends were often spent shuttling the kids from one activity to the next until the sun went down. So you can imagine I was less than impressed that when I told my boys to dress up and get ready for their day, they decided to fight with each other, ignore us, and talk over us. Did, even though we knew what time we had to go.
This was even with the extra time of stopping caffeine along the way. I’m not spending my day in the car without coffee.
At this point, I’m fed up of following them around the house. They manage to take off their pajamas, but only to use them as weapons, not to get into outerwear.
As I watch, the clock is ticking and my anger meter boils over.
I say firmly, “You will be late for chess.”
Nothing.
I yell, “You have to get ready 15 minutes early and get in the car. “Can you get dressed so we can go?”
I caught sight of it, but everyone kept moving slowly.
I knew something had to be done, so I called Uber
I couldn’t take it. I took out my phone and opened the Uber app.
Before you “@” me, I didn’t put them in Uber (although it was tempting).
No, I wanted to see the cost of the trip, $14 one way.
Then I started writing.
“I have to pay you $28 for a lift today because you were rude and didn’t listen to me.”
Then I put together a list of chores with a price for each.
I went over to my oldest brother, and with steam blowing out of my ears I said, “I’m not taking you to Chess unless you sign this.”
Then I immediately added a life lesson: “Read this first. You shouldn’t sign anything you haven’t read!”
He seemed surprised.
I reminded him that he was already late and that I would not get in the car when he got home without a signed contract to do these things.
He signed, so we left.
“I am not a slave”
Later that day, as he walked in the door, I reminded him of his duties. She took off her clothes and fought with me with all her might.
Throwing out lines like “I’m not a slave,” “This is so boring,” and “This is taking forever.”
Difficult relationship, baby!
When I taught him how to hang clothes on hangers, he got into the rhythm. The same applies to putting clothes on the line.
Of course, with my husband supervising, they chopped vegetables for salads and flipped burgers on the barbecue.
I noticed that there was some change in him. He was proud. He had learned a new skill. He felt important. He felt responsible.
And I felt validated.
At the end of the day, as parents, we glorify Uber drivers. But this does not mean that our children can avoid being rude. They wouldn’t do this to a stranger, so why should they do it to people who are hanging around them?
After this weekend, I’ll give them a four-star rating. More importantly, they now understand the mundane tasks that I do for them for free.
