They don’t want people giving them crap.
A Williamsburg cafe has bombarded its broom-closet-sized bathroom’s walls and door with a dozen signs to warn backed-up customers.
“No Poop! No! To Everything! Except for tinkle and small amounts of toilet paper. The pipes can’t handle it,” reads one gargantuan sign hanging over the john at Social House Cafe.
“No s–ting!” another sign featuring Uncle Sam implores.
Caroline Hill, an artist who works down the block, said she had rushed into the store this week to go number 2, but the call of nature dissipated after witnessing the store’s poo-free campaign.
“The variety of the vocabulary, all the ways they came up to say ‘Do not poop in this toilet,’ really hammered it home for me,” she told The Post.
Hill posted photos Monday on X of the store’s war on crappy customers, and they quickly went viral with over 6.3 million views.
Critics sniffed over the brazenness of a coffee shop shaming its clientele into holding in their business.
“A place that sells coffee but you’re NOT allowed to poop is diabolical,” one user wrote.
Social House co-owner William Somerville bizarrely poo-pooed the idea that customers couldn’t let nature call in his cafe’s commode — despite slapping up at least 12 signs saying just that.
Instead, he claimed the messaging is an effort to deter people from flushing tampons and other machine-made products down their ancient pipes, Somerville said, adding toilet repairs cost the business more than $10,000 last year alone.
“Since we put the signs up, it’s helped with people not putting things in the toilet that weren’t supposed to be in it,” he said.
